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“I am Yahweh your God, who brought you out of the land of Egypt, out of the house of bondage.                “You shall have no other gods before me.                “You shall not make for yourselves an idol, nor any image of anything that is in the heavens above, or that is in the earth beneath, or that is in the water under the earth: you shall not bow yourself down to them, nor serve them, for I, Yahweh your God, am a jealous God, visiting the iniquity of the fathers on the children, on the third and on the fourth generation of those who hate me, and showing loving kindness to thousands of those who love me and keep my commandments.                “You shall not take the name of Yahweh your God in vain, for Yahweh will not hold him guiltless who takes his name in vain.                “Remember the Sabbath day, to keep it holy. You shall labor six days, and do all your work, but the seventh day is a Sabbath to Yahweh your God. You shall not do any work in it, you, nor your son, nor your daughter, your male servant, nor your female servant, nor your livestock, nor your stranger who is within your gates; for in six days Yahweh made heaven and earth, the sea, and all that is in them, and rested the seventh day; therefore Yahweh blessed the Sabbath day, and made it holy.                “Honor your father and your mother, that your days may be long in the land which Yahweh your God gives you.                “You shall not murder.                “You shall not commit adultery.                “You shall not steal.                “You shall not give false testimony against your neighbor.                “You shall not covet your neighbor’s house. You shall not covet your neighbor’s wife, nor his male servant, nor his female servant, nor his ox, nor his donkey, nor anything that is your neighbor’s.”
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He Destroyed My Love
   

A testimony
Love One Another! 2/2003 → a testimony

Love One Another



First of all, I would like to express my gratitude for this magazine, for the love it exemplifies, and the wise teachings it contains. It reached my hands at the moment I most I needed it. Since then I have read many peoples’ personal testimonies. Their advice has been useful to me, and it helps somehow to know that I am not the only one suffering this way. In writing this letter, I am seeking after the truth. I also want others to understand the depth of my pain and suffering.

 

It started when I fell in love with a guy. He seemed to be the boy of my dreams. Good-looking. Handsome. Quite himself. It felt good being around him. So it had to be true love — I thought. After our first meeting, we saw each other again twice, and I felt so happy. By the time we met for the third time, I was too much in love to realize what I was doing. Sweet and gentle in his manner, he showered me with passionate kisses. But he wanted more. And since it felt so good to be with him, I could not say no. Besides, I had to know what it was like to sleep with a guy. I agreed. It happened.
It is hard to say what it was like. He was very gentle, and I felt he had really tried to please me. He repaid my intimacy with more passionate kisses and sweet words. On coming home, I was unable to sleep. My mind raced with thoughts and images of what had passed between us. I felt like a real woman, that I was truly loved. When we met again, I was so in love that I gave in to his every whim, without considering that his demands might be becoming excessive. After a while, it began to dawn on me that our relationship was based mainly on sex. It got to the point that when we would meet, we did not even talk; we just had sex. In my heart, I knew something was lacking — something more beautiful than sex alone. I needed to be assured that he truly loved me.
Our relationship cooled, and my suffering increased. Where was the true affection that was supposed to underlie our physical intimacy? One day he looked me over with a total lack of interest. He said he was tired. I could make no sense of it. Did he really love me, or had he just been using me? That day he left with no expression of interest in me. He left no word when we would meet again, and I did not have the courage to ask.
The suffering that then entered my heart, and the emptiness I felt, knew no bounds. I felt I could not love anymore. The love I had offered was destroyed. There was nothing more to give. I realized I had been used in a disgusting manner, for I had given away what was most precious to me, and received pain and suffering in return. I grew to regret everything, to hate the very day I had met him. At the same time, I could not forget the look in his eyes when we had first met, the fascination we had felt for each other. The question now torments me. Why did I, who had so anticipated that day, thinking it would be so special, receive such short shrift from the person I had loved, and to whom I had given everything? I had been tricked. The thought of the future now frightens me. I feel I have lost the ability to trust — especially men.
If someone were now to seek my advice, I would say let your “first time” be with the one to whom you have pledged your love — your wife or husband. True love must be based on friendship, trust and, most importantly, on belief in Christ. Now I know that it is not worth losing your peace of mind over sex. Sex is only beautiful when it is expressed through love in marriage. It is the way God intended it. I hope someone has heard and understood me. Thank you and God bless!
 
Anne
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The above article was published with permission from Miłujcie się! in November 2010


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