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You have heard that it was said, 'You shall not commit adultery;'                but I tell you that everyone who gazes at a woman to lust after her has committed adultery with her already in his heart.                If your right eye causes you to stumble, pluck it out and throw it away from you. For it is more profitable for you that one of your members should perish, than for your whole body to be cast into Gehenna.                If your right hand causes you to stumble, cut it off, and throw it away from you. For it is more profitable for you that one of your members should perish, than for your whole body to be cast into Gehenna.                'It was also said, 'Whoever shall put away his wife, let him give her a writing of divorce,'                but I tell you that whoever puts away his wife, except for the cause of sexual immorality, makes her an adulteress; and whoever marries her when she is put away commits adultery.                'Again you have heard that it was said to them of old time, 'You shall not make false vows, but shall perform to the Lord your vows,'                but I tell you, don't swear at all: neither by heaven, for it is the throne of God;                nor by the earth, for it is the footstool of his feet; nor by Jerusalem, for it is the city of the great King.                Neither shall you swear by your head, for you can't make one hair white or black.                But let your 'Yes' be 'Yes' and your 'No' be 'No.' Whatever is more than these is of the evil one.                'You have heard that it was said, 'An eye for an eye, and a tooth for a tooth.'*                But I tell you, don't resist him who is evil; but whoever strikes you on your right cheek, turn to him the other also.                If anyone sues you to take away your coat, let him have your cloak also.                Whoever compels you to go one mile, go with him two.                Give to him who asks you, and don't turn away him who desires to borrow from you.                'You have heard that it was said, 'You shall love your neighbor,* and hate your enemy.*'                But I tell you, love your enemies, bless those who curse you, do good to those who hate you, and pray for those who mistreat you and persecute you,                that you may be children of your Father who is in heaven.               
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He Destroyed My Love
   

A testimony
Love One Another! 2/2003 → a testimony

Love One Another



First of all, I would like to express my gratitude for this magazine, for the love it exemplifies, and the wise teachings it contains. It reached my hands at the moment I most I needed it. Since then I have read many peoples’ personal testimonies. Their advice has been useful to me, and it helps somehow to know that I am not the only one suffering this way. In writing this letter, I am seeking after the truth. I also want others to understand the depth of my pain and suffering.

 

It started when I fell in love with a guy. He seemed to be the boy of my dreams. Good-looking. Handsome. Quite himself. It felt good being around him. So it had to be true love — I thought. After our first meeting, we saw each other again twice, and I felt so happy. By the time we met for the third time, I was too much in love to realize what I was doing. Sweet and gentle in his manner, he showered me with passionate kisses. But he wanted more. And since it felt so good to be with him, I could not say no. Besides, I had to know what it was like to sleep with a guy. I agreed. It happened.
It is hard to say what it was like. He was very gentle, and I felt he had really tried to please me. He repaid my intimacy with more passionate kisses and sweet words. On coming home, I was unable to sleep. My mind raced with thoughts and images of what had passed between us. I felt like a real woman, that I was truly loved. When we met again, I was so in love that I gave in to his every whim, without considering that his demands might be becoming excessive. After a while, it began to dawn on me that our relationship was based mainly on sex. It got to the point that when we would meet, we did not even talk; we just had sex. In my heart, I knew something was lacking — something more beautiful than sex alone. I needed to be assured that he truly loved me.
Our relationship cooled, and my suffering increased. Where was the true affection that was supposed to underlie our physical intimacy? One day he looked me over with a total lack of interest. He said he was tired. I could make no sense of it. Did he really love me, or had he just been using me? That day he left with no expression of interest in me. He left no word when we would meet again, and I did not have the courage to ask.
The suffering that then entered my heart, and the emptiness I felt, knew no bounds. I felt I could not love anymore. The love I had offered was destroyed. There was nothing more to give. I realized I had been used in a disgusting manner, for I had given away what was most precious to me, and received pain and suffering in return. I grew to regret everything, to hate the very day I had met him. At the same time, I could not forget the look in his eyes when we had first met, the fascination we had felt for each other. The question now torments me. Why did I, who had so anticipated that day, thinking it would be so special, receive such short shrift from the person I had loved, and to whom I had given everything? I had been tricked. The thought of the future now frightens me. I feel I have lost the ability to trust — especially men.
If someone were now to seek my advice, I would say let your “first time” be with the one to whom you have pledged your love — your wife or husband. True love must be based on friendship, trust and, most importantly, on belief in Christ. Now I know that it is not worth losing your peace of mind over sex. Sex is only beautiful when it is expressed through love in marriage. It is the way God intended it. I hope someone has heard and understood me. Thank you and God bless!
 
Anne
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The above article was published with permission from Miłujcie się! in November 2010


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