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By Testimony,
Looking at our daughter, we are sometimes led to reflect on the mystery of suffering…
As I write this testimony, I have been living in a happy marriage for ten years. However, the situation that I will describe below took place more or less two years ago. At the time, having two children, we wanted to invite another little one into our family The expectationWe thought that, as was the case with the prior two children, there would be no problem with conceiving this time either. However, it didn’t turn out that way, and we found out rather quickly that this time there was something wrong. In order to rest and regenerate our energy, we took a vacation, and started taking better care of our own health. What was surprising for us was that the problem of infertility can affect even the parents of healthy children. Both my husband and I are teachers of natural family planning, however, our knowledge of the subject didn’t give us a solution to the problem. Around this time a friend of ours showed us the bulletin of the Warsaw Hospice for Children. The testimonies of the parents who had sick children who were being cared for at the WHC had a powerful effect on us. Also at this time we ran across the film I Am, which told stories of Eucharistic miracles. One of the miracles also took place in Poland, in Sokółka – a small town near the Belarusian border. We determined to make our way to Sokółka over vacation. Sokółka – a miraculous placeDuring our visit to the church, our children were so extraordinarily quiet and absorbed that my husband and I were able to pray for a longer period of time. Seeing the Miraculous Host was an extraordinary spiritual experience. I remember that I offered up our powerlessness over the subsequent pregnancy to God, since it is He, after all, who is the giver of all life.
Not long after we returned home, I found out that I was pregnant. We were so happy! We quickly started to share the news with family and friends. It was obvious to us that the pregnancy was a miracle, a distinct miracle from Sokółka. A question without an answerTwo days before Christmas 2012 I found out that our baby (a girl) had a heart defect, and that there were two cysts in her brain. I remember that I accepted the information calmly, but I could also feel the anxiety over what might come next, what it all meant. When I returned home, I told my husband that our daughter, Emilka (we had already chosen the name), was sick, and that I very much needed his support, because I wouldn’t manage on my own. I also told him that I was afraid, and that I couldn’t understand it all. From that day on my husband supported me staunchly, and I knew that together, we would get through this more easily. The Christmas holidays were difficult for us. I was going through an internal struggle. After a few days God gave me the grace to accept His will. “God, You gave us this little miracle. I don’t understand why the baby is sick, but I accept her. I ask You for the strength to endure to the end”. I repeated it every day up to the day that Emilka left us. The tests and the assault on heavenIn January in the office of the specialist, they were able to confirm what the obstetrician had seen, and also found that Emilka was suffering from several other defects. The results of the genetic tests at the hospital revealed the so-called Edwards Syndrome. This would be the death sentence for our Emilka. That evening I sent a text message to our family and friends with a request for their prayers. We received their answers assuring me of their prayers immediately. They in turn involved their families, friends, and religious orders. Masses were offered for us and our sick Emilka. My husband and I could see that our daughter was a miracle, and we prayed for the subsequent miracle of her recovery. I thoroughly believed that God could cure her of this condition, but I also knew that the Creator had His own plans. We could feel the power of the prayers. My husband said he could actually feel it almost tangibly. That prayer had been like a protective umbrella spread out over our family. We received the grace of joy, despite the human drama of the situation. We also told our other children that their sister was sick, and that she could die at any moment, maybe even before she was born. They were saddened, but they accepted the information. I felt that God was directing everything. The visit to the hospiceIn March we went to the Warsaw Prenatal Hospice. The director offered us a number of valuable pointers along with advice about the birth and the necessary care after birth. That visit to Warsaw mollified many of our doubts. We took advantage of the proximity to also visit Sokółka again. We believed that only God could heal our baby, and that it was a real possibility. But God had other plans… Entry into the worldEmilka was born May 14, 2013. My husband baptized her even before the umbilical cord was cut. It was an emotional moment that we had long looked forward to. I think that being able to cuddle her after she was born was what I had been looking forward to most. From the time that I found out that she was sick I asked God just that I might have the opportunity to see her and hold her. Emilka showed no signs of life. But after a moment, she took a breath and started breathing. The pediatricians took the baby to their unit, and tended to her for two weeks. During those two weeks, I was visiting my daughter, and bringing her food. At this point I’d like to thank the registrar in the neonatal unit for the amiability she demonstrated, and her many valuable insights. Welcome home!At the sight of little Emilka the older children were jumping and shouting for joy. The doctor and nurse who brought Emilka home were amazed to see such joy. The care of the doctors and the nurses for Emilka was provided by the Poznan Greater Poland Home Hospice for Children. They also provided access to psychological help. The days passed, and we learned how to care for the sick baby. As it turned out, in our circumstances it was even possible for us to take Emilka on vacation with us. She was in good condition. We went to the seaside town of Hel. We were so happy to be travelling with our sick baby that a week after we got home, we decided to go out again, this time to the Holy Cross Mountains. Good-bye my angel!September arrived and our baby had her first attack of epilepsy, which, as time went on, came all the more frequently and became all the more powerful. This was a development typical for her condition. Looking at our daughter, we were sometimes led to reflect on the mystery of suffering… On November 20, 2013, our daughter was born into heaven. She had spent six months, six days, and two hours with us. It was a beautiful time which led to developing family ties for us. God took up all of our anxieties and turned them into love. I very tangibly experienced that God is the one who gives life, and every life is worthwhile. I found out that it’s not possible not to love a sick child, that every person is the greatest miracle. I experienced that the prayers of many people (both known to us and unknown) are very powerful, and that by saying “yes” to God, we received joy and peace from Him in return. Throughout the experience I kept in mind a verse that I would like to share. It comes from the book The Way by St. Josemaria Escriva: “What is my cross, Jesus, in comparison to Yours? What are my injuries beside Your wounds? What, compared to Your enormous, pure, and boundless love, is this trivial concern that You have lain on my shoulders?”. Dorota Source: https://loamagazine.org/archive/2017/2017-39/life-is-a-miracle The above article was published with permission from Miłujcie się! in April 2021. Read more Christian articles (English)
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