Marriage and Family Acceptance (Teachings of the Orthodox Church) Christianity. Orthodoxy. Catholicism. Sense of life. Articles for Christians.
Don't be anxious for your life, what you will eat, nor yet for your body, what you will wear.                Life is more than food, and the body is more than clothing.                Consider the ravens: they don't sow, they don't reap, they have no warehouse or barn, and God feeds them. How much more valuable are you than birds!                Which of you by being anxious can add a cubit to his height?                If then you aren't able to do even the least things, why are you anxious about the rest?                Consider the lilies, how they grow. They don't toil, neither do they spin; yet I tell you, even Solomon in all his glory was not arrayed like one of these.                But if this is how God clothes the grass in the field, which today exists, and tomorrow is cast into the oven, how much more will he clothe you, O you of little faith?                Don't seek what you will eat or what you will drink; neither be anxious.                For the nations of the world seek after all of these things, but your Father knows that you need these things.                But seek God's Kingdom, and all these things will be added to you.               
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Marriage and Family Acceptance (Teachings of the Orthodox Church)
   

QUESTION:

My fiance is Orthodox, and I am not. I am not interested in converting, but I respect and honor his religion because I honor him. We have dated for five years and he accepts my philosphies.

The difficulty is his family; they refuse to even acknowledge me. They are immigrants who have lived in America for 50 years. They will not meet me and have never invited me into their home. I plan to let my husband raise our children in the Orthodox Church and send them to church school weekly if he wishes.

Is it not sinful to treat a fellow human this way? Is it not sinful to try to damage a marriage? Other than converting, do you have any advice?

ANSWER:

Since I do not know you personally and I do not know that much about your situation, other than what you have shared in your e-mail, I cannot comment on specifics.

I can say that "walling" oneself off from others is indeed sinful. In some ways it constitutes emotional murder, so to speak, inasmuch as by refusing to acknowledge your presence and existence, the family is refusing to recognize the presence of God in another human being, as scripture commands us to do.

Perhaps reading the epistle read at the marriage service (Eph 5:20-33) might offer some ideas as to how you should proceed.

I might also recommend that you and your fiance speak to the priest at the Orthodox parish in which you wish to be married. It would seem that unless this situation is somehow resolved before the wedding it may become a bone of contention for years to come.






Published in January 2011.








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